Jackie

 She had never felt smoke in her lungs before, nor the sting of hard liquor.  But tonight, and after months of pushing bottles and cigarettes Jackie's way, the offers were finally accepted.  

It was the liquor that hit her first, the warm numb sensation that she found was much needed.  She copied Sadie and Bridgette with what she felt were deep inhales of the cigarettes that did nothing for her except to look like what she felt she was on the inside. Burning.

"It's what they do!" Bridgette shuffled cards downward and let her smoke hang from her lips. She squinted and scowled when she spoke as though she was frustrated she even had to speak in the first place; like you should already know everything she was ever about to say.

"Sadie tell her! Tell her the one who tricked you." Sadie's great big eyes softened. Her head tiled slightly and she exhaled deeply. "Trouble is, they get caught up, Jackie.  I think even they start to believe the things they tell you. "

"Then come the promises, don't they Sadie?  Tell her what he promised you!" Jackie was content to let Sadie speak, but Bridgette clearly wanted Sadie expedite her memories.

Sadie obliged and continued, "He told me we would live somewhere else. Make a fresh start."

Bridgette popped a laugh out so loud it made Sadie flinch in her memory. "They all say it...They're all alike girls."

"He used to hold my hand in this way, like he was holding something...precious." Sadie reached for Jackie's hand and held it warmly in her own.

Bridgette was not taken in by the sentiment and baulked, "Cherries are sweeter when the trees well kept, they say!"

Jackie could see the hurt is Sadie's eyes, still after all these years the hurt was still fresh, "He told me he loved me..."

"Good god! How did we become so easy as to fall for all of this rubbish?" 

"It wasn't rubbish!"

"If it wasn't, you wouldn't be here now would ya?  None of us would. We'd all be galivanted away by Princes, Judges and Accountants who have fallen madly in love with us!"

"Except that nobody has told you that they love you, have they Bridgette?" Bridgette was befuddled and taken completely off guard.  

Sadie continued. "And why would they?  You're  and loud and you have no decency!"

What should have quieted Bridgette's pride only uncovered more of it, "Men pay me for my indecency, and that's just what I give them. Besides, what's it to you? You walk around like you've won some prize meriting the affections of a man who comes in here? Please! A promise from a man who likes to pay girls he fucks so he can put them in positions no upright man ever would, if an upright man even exists! I don't need to know what it feels like to to lose in a game I was never meant to win. Have you ever seen an older couple in love? People with children are the unhappiest people in the world the men are tied down and the women are unloved.  It doesn't exist, love doesn't exist and the sooner you can accept that and let it die the sooner you'll be holding that fist of dollars that's your ticket out of here."

Slowly, Jackie was understanding Bridgette, "But if it doesn't exist, what's the point of leaving here?"

Bridgette placed her hand gently on Jackie's shoulder, "At least in here there aren't any lies" Bridgette was content to get the last word in. "I'll leave you girls to your heartache, too much and it's bound to be contagious.

https://open.spotify.com/track/0TQ8ZHFhrbH9I0WRjIzOCQ?si=8e7149e976704a41